Purple, Green, and Gold

Happy Mardi Gras everyone! If any of you wants to flash your breasts from the

Word Oyster balcony, I'll be more than happy to swap in your gratuitous boob shot for my Photo of the Day for an hour or so! But hurry! Fat Tuesday doesn't last forever!

Allow me to apologize up front, but I'm afraid I've accumulated yet another bunch of links to articles about penis length. (For the first bunch, see Sighs Matter from last October.) For instance, a recent study of men who underwent penis enlargement surgery found that 65% of them weren't happy with the results. The procedure, which involves cutting the ligament that holds the penis in place and which then allows the penis to drop lower, added only about half an inch of length to their flaccid, stretched penis…

Time out. You say you didn't know that measuring the penis when it is soft and deflated is the only fair way to go? Silly you. There are actually rules for measuring penis length and lots of studies that have done just that.

This time, the reporter is saying that the average for an unstretched penis is 3.5 to 4 inches. The average for a flaccid, stretched penis is 5.1 inches. Mind you, that's for a "self-stretched" penis. Once you involve someone else doing the stretching… all bets are off.

So, thanks goodness for blood flow and the corpora cavernosa! And if you don't know what those are, then you should check out this article about how Viagra works, which also explains how erections work. It sounds like there's one gentleman in Serbia who could have used some Viagra to get an erection instead of resorting to his MacGyver idea. Ouch.

Comments:

• *sigh*

  oh, how i miss mardi gras. before i moved to St. Louis, i went to seven true blue New Orleans mardi gras-s.. (umm. how do you pluralise that?) in a row. (i’m from mississippi. it’s RIGHT THERE.. how could i NOT go??) and i showed my boobs to anybody who would trhow cheap plastic baubles at me…

  what a thrilling thing. in that context, boobs mean next to nothing. they aren’t even sexually arousing. the thrill of the atmosphere revolves around getting beads, catching dubloons, yelling screaming and getting drunker than you ever have before. that kind of removes the “ooh, boobies!” element from play. showing any part of your body at mardi gras doesn’t seem like a big deal at all, no matter what they look like.

  i’m a big girl. most of the time, people in clubs wouldn’t really care if i showed my boobs or not. but there, boobs=beads, no matter how pretty they are. now, i happen to think i DO have pretty boobs, and several people agree with me, and i DO wish i had a beads+boobs pic to send ! *pout* damn broken digital camera…

  before i moved and distributed my fat tuesday booty amongst my friends, i had a box of beads that contained every strand that i had ever caught at mardi gras. it was big enough to literally fill a big bathtub. i could have swum in those beads..

  *lament!!* man, that would have made a COOL pic!..

  aw, damn…

  Posted by mikki  on  02/28/06  at  04:25 PM
  
  

• All this penis size stuff makes me glad I’m female. I can’t think of any time in my life I’ve compared boob sizes.

  Posted by JeN  on  02/28/06  at  06:59 PM
  
  

• Just think of all the time you’ve saved, JeN! Again, I don’t make the news; I just report it. But I am declaring a moritorium on penis size stories for the next year. If I see them, I will not pass them on. You won’t hear it from me. Nosiree, Bob!

  And yes, mikki, a photo of you in a tub of beads and doubloons would have been terrific! I didn’t come away from my years in Nawlins with that many beads. Must have been my lack of boobs.

  Posted by Prospero  on  03/01/06  at  09:03 AM
  
  

• wow… jen’s friends never compared boobs??

  my friends and i ALWAYS compared boobs! i have small boobs compared to most of my friends, but then again, most of them have BIG boobs: D or bigger, mostly DD or E’s and a few with F, G, and one unlucky friend (and i DO mean unlucky...) with size 38-L boobs.

  me and my nice little C’s (b’s if i can find just the right kind of bra) are perfectly fine with me. beads drape over and around them nicely. *smile*

  *sighs* you know, Prospero, i think i have enough friends that i can maybe collect a tubful of beads… that photo op is just getting too tempting for me. if i ever set it up, i’ll make double sure to send you a copy…

  (incidentally, when tried to post this, it put up a could not be submitted due to questionable content thingie.. which it did due to the word bee are ee ess tee… boobs is apparently okay?)

  Posted by mikki  on  03/01/06  at  11:37 AM
  
  

• Oops. I wonder how that happened. That’s as bad as AOL. I can write fuck and cock, but can’t write b-r-e-a-s-t. I’ll have to figure out why that is when I get time. It wasn’t me, I swear.

  Posted by Prospero  on  03/01/06  at  11:47 AM
  
  

• hee hee I could have had a great pic form Mardi Gras (albeit just our local bar’s party) but didn;t realize you were taking submissions.

  Anyway, guess I’ve been lucky as most of the guys I’ve been with have been quiet nicely equipped. Well above average.

  You can’t compare boobs really- I figure as long as they look good on you, that’s half the battle right there! MIne I think are way too big.. but unless I lost a lot of weight, they;d just look small and misproportioned on me. Guess I’ll keep them and let them shrink with the rest of me!

  Posted by Debra  on  03/29/06  at  05:21 AM
  
  
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